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Encouraging Elderly Parents to Accept Help

Chanda Care • May 07, 2022

When it comes to aging parents, the issue of independence can often be a tricky one. On the one hand, aging parents may fear losing their autonomy and becoming a burden on their children. On the other hand, they may require more help as they grow older and start to struggle with day-to-day tasks that were once routine. Whether it's help with cooking, cleaning, or caring for their health, accepting help can be difficult for older adults.


Despite this reluctance, it is important for children to take steps to encourage their elderly parents to accept assistance when needed. After all, there is no shame in needing help sometimes – for anyone at any age. By being supportive and understanding of your parent's feelings, you can show them that getting extra help isn't a sign of weakness or defeat; rather, it is simply part of growing older and living a full life. With your support and encouragement, your aging parent will hopefully come to see the value in accepting help from those around them – both for their own wellbeing as well as yours. After all, helping elderly relatives stay happy and healthy should be something we strive for as children and caregivers alike!




Dealing with elderly parents who refuse help?


Here are some tips on how you can encourage aging parents to accept the assistance they need:



Let them feel like they are making decisions


When it comes to asking for help, elderly parents may be more likely to accept assistance if they feel like they are in control of the situation. This may mean giving them a choice of home caregivers or giving them the opportunity to veto certain types of help. This way, your parent will still feel like they are making decisions and will be more likely to welcome the help and accept it. Similarly, try to avoid being overly forceful or demanding when asking them to accept help. This will only make them feel more resistant and less likely to comply.


Give lots of options


When it comes to dealing with elderly parents who are struggling to manage on their own, try and strive to provide them with plenty of options and let them choose how they want to proceed. By enabling aging parents to maintain some degree of independence, you can create a more positive experience for everyone involved and give them the support they need to age gracefully. Ultimately, by approaching the situation from a place of caring and compassion rather than control and judgment, we can make sure that everyone feels supported during this challenging time.


Show Empathy


Aging Parents refuse assistance for a variety of reasons. They are concerned they may have a problem with a caregiver. They want to control their life but they also prefer independence. In these situations, it's important to show empathy. Try to understand why your parent is refusing help. They may be worried about losing their independence or being a burden on their family. Once you understand their perspective, you can have a discussion about what kind of help they are willing to accept. In some cases, simply showing empathy and understanding can be enough to get your parent to accept the help they need.


Encourage a trial period


If your parent is resistant or if your aging parent refuses the idea of accepting help, try suggesting a trial period. This will allow them to experience the benefits of having assistance without making a long-term commitment. After the trial period is over, they can then decide if they want to continue with the arrangement or not. This can be an effective way to get your parent to accept help, especially if they are hesitant about the idea.


Reassure them


It can be difficult to watch our elderly parents struggle with the challenges of old age. As their child, it is natural for you to worry about them and want to provide all the support you can. However, it is important not to let this concern cause you to feel frustrated or disregarded. Instead, take a moment to offer reassurance that you will be there every step of the way and that they can always turn to you when they need help. With time and patience, your elderly parents will likely come around and realize that accepting some help from you is actually in their best interests. In the meantime, continue providing support whenever possible and staying hopeful for the future. With love and understanding, your elderly parents are sure to get through this challenging time together.

Stay Hopeful and Continue to Offer Support


If you are in a situation where your elderly parent is refusing help, it is important to continue to offer support and assistance in whatever way you can. You may need to be more creative in how you provide that support, but it is vital that you do not give up on your parent. Offer compassion, understanding, and patience; these will go a long way in helping both of you through this difficult time.


Chanda Care can help in assisting elderly parents who maybe struggling to understand the best options for living in place. Our team of professional caregivers can provide the support, companionship and assistance that aging parents need to age gracefully in the comfort of their own homes. To learn more about our services and how we can help your elderly parent accept the assistance they need, contact us today to schedule a free consultation

  • What can I do if my elderly parents refuse needed care?

    It can be difficult to watch a loved one age and decline in health, especially when your elderly parents refuse the help they need. If your elderly parent is refusing needed care, there are a few things you can do to try and get them to accept it. First, try to understand their perspective and why they are resistant to help. Next, suggest a trial period to see if they change their mind after experiencing the benefits of having assistance. Finally, reassure them that you will be there for them every step of the way and continue to offer support in whatever way you can. With love and patience, your elderly parent is likely to come around and accept the help they need.


  • How do you deal with a negative elderly parent?

    It can be difficult dealing with a negative elderly parent, especially if that parent is also going through the changes and challenges of growing old. There are many ways to approach this situation, but ultimately the key is to maintain a calm and respectful attitude at all times. This may mean setting firm boundaries when it comes to certain behaviors or requests, while also listening attentively to whatever your parent has to say. It's also important to seek support from other family members and professionals working with your parent, such as doctors or social workers.


  • What do you do when your parents won't take care of themselves?

    If your parents won't take care of themselves, it is important to try and understand why they are resistant to help. It could be that they are worried about the cost of care or don't want to burden you with their care. In any case, it is important to have a discussion with your parents about their care needs and how you can help. For example, you may offer to help them find home care services or other support options that can make caring for themselves easier. Ultimately, the key is to be understanding, compassionate, and non-judgmental as you work with your parents to come up with a care plan that works for everyone involved.



Don't Lose Hope


When dealing with an aging parent who resists help, it is important to keep hope and optimism at the forefront of your mind. Remember that this situation is not easy for them either, and try to stay patient and understanding as you work through any concerns or disagreements. By maintaining a positive attitude and focusing on what you can do for your parent rather than what you are unable to do, you can take steps forward toward a healthier and more fulfilling relationship. And who knows - perhaps in time, your parent will come to see all of the support that you offer as invaluable. After all, when dealing with loved ones who are facing old age and possible decline, every moment counts. So don't lose hope - stay strong and keep moving forward!


If you are a family caregiver struggling with assisting elderly parents, Chanda Care can help provide assistance and support. You're not in this alone and you deserve to get the support you need! Contact us today to schedule a free consultation and learn more about our services. We look forward to working with you.​


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